Birthday cyclamen – always a white sheep in every family
One out of four is fine by me. Or if I add the words “of spirit” after the top three, I have arrived. I have worked a lot inside myself on Peace the past few years. Finally, on the day that arrives with an AARP membership birthday card, I am able to acknowledge a peace generator resides in me.
Speaking of AARP, the entire concept of retirement looks like a mirage from a bygone era from where I sit. I know I’m in good company being a month-to-month survivalist, working more than full-time to have what most consider “basic needs” and likely being required to do so until the end. But I’ve made my peace with all I do have moment to moment. In addition, I was told today I look 40, not 50, so I’ve got a decade of extra moments to embrace.
My Peace recipe includes a few ideal ingredients, but the one non-negotiable seems to be consciously pressing pause repetitively throughout a day and greeting myself with a kind hand. The recipe is enhanced by each day adding fruit, oats, vegetables, Holy basil tea, a walk of 2 to 3 miles, and taking at least one action to benefit another person somewhere in my journey from sun to moon.
While so much terrifying and disheartening uncertainty lies ahead in the human realm of poopy political power (loving the aliteration) and absolute horrific humanitarian disaster, I have paradoxically nourished an inside realm of Peace that feels inviolable. Surely this power is greater than any other.
Many around me have experienced great turmoil and loss this past year, but peak moments for me have involved spontaneous, profound encounters with animals and trees during my wanderings, of greater depth than any I’ve experienced this far. I am 100% certain my future lies in allowing Earth to speak through me, take actions to protect our home, and assist people in picking up pieces of their sacred connection with Earth.
Taking steps to honor what calls to me, I am gifting myself a 24-hour retreat in a sanctuary that celebrates Earth and life and giving myself permission to be away from work and electrical stimulus with the intention of clarifying my intentions for my future, making a gift to water to honor all water protectors, and being receptive to messages from existence. Bonus gift, my teen could really use a break from Mom.
The coming year includes a need to work harder than ever during the first half to support my fledgling’s flight during the second half. Her adventure away from home base for an entire year (exchange program) opens a horizon colored by the long list of things I feel called to do when not required to work 7 days a week.
Many thanks to Mollycules, who just mailed out her new deck of cards to see me through another year. The first card I pulled spoke directly to a fear I can let go of now…a fear I will never figure out what’s wrong with me simply because I have not arrived at the first three above-listed Ps by a certain age. It is entirely possible nothing is wrong.
Is it a planet? A smurf? A blue infinity string sculpture?
I actually requested this blue blob, and my family members listened. THANK YOU : ) For my 11th birthday, my German grandmother gifted me a Wunderknolle (Google translates as “marrow” in English so I have no idea of the correct spelling of the word, but I always thought it meant “wonder ball”). It is a ball of yarn filled with tiny gifts that become revealed as a knitter knits. My family managed to fit 50 presents inside 500 yards of yarn! As soon as holiday gifts are completed and pink hats are on women’s heads for the Women’s March, I will begin unwinding the Wunderknolle to work on my first ever creation for myself, in the form of this sweater jacket. (Click on images for pattern) In this way, my 50th birthday celebration and gratitude for familial love will last well into 2017!