Pride is usually ego talking, but when no one else knows what you have accomplished as well as you, it is time for a Pat on the Back.
This year I feel proud of how far I have come, and want to document a few arcs toward greater stability and greater self-understanding just so that I can look back on this point as a stepping stone to my future of abundance, joy, rewarding friendships with those who “get” the Highly Sensitive Person trait, and the ever-elusive mutually supportive relationship (moving right along past temporary hallucination). . . if the future exists only in our mind, it’s still a nice dream to hold, eh?
Since January 2012, I have stayed at my desk for 60 hours per week and gained back the 40 pounds I lost 2 years ago despite wanting to train for marathons, do fun stuff, and have a life of more than work, eat, sleep, rinse, repeat. The trade-off has been that I have accomplished paying off my debts, staying off food bank and state assistance (nothing wrong with it – just so nice not to have a hand out all the time), able to give financially to others when I feel moved, providing health insurance for my child, and saving for next month’s Mommy-Daughter vacation for the first time in 5 years! Bravo!
Since January 2012, I have taken classes and read countless books on the themes of identifying what is evolving in me and collaborating with others, understanding myself better, and visioning my contribution to the world for the 2nd half of my life. To this end, I am seeking help from a fellow single mom to develop a webpage for my nonprofit-in-the-works. Once the webpage for Healing Outdoors is complete, I will begin the networking involved in getting the party started toward the endeavor closest to my heart. Bravo!
For all women out there trying to make a midlife shift and needing a boost, I highly recommend reading the no-nonsense work of this woman: Jennifer Boykin’s Blog
And the work of Lisa Nichols.
My heart is always guiding me toward earning money for the sake of giving it away to those in greater need, toward simplicity and away from extravagant living, so if I ever break past my “limiting beliefs” and enter into greater personal abundance financially and socially, my ripples in the world will become as big as my capacity to give.