Sitting Inside Illusion

Royal Mile by designer Justyna Lorkowska

Fresh off my needles, I used Italian Plum colorway of Cascade Heritage yarn and Alameda colorway of Hawthorne Fingering Multi from Knitpicks.

This swoopy, light wrap reminding me of twilight sky can belong to you. If you donate $50 to my daughter’s gofundme page anytime from June through August, you will be entered into a drawing. If interested, you can follow a blog of her adventure.

Why this post title?

Because today I awoke thinking I would sit down to work only to find a server had crashed in a place far, far away that controls the flow of my work. One small reminder of how control over our life is an illusion. Amid all the turmoil this year in the sociopolitical landscape that expands emotions of fear, anxiety and compassion for all the vulnerable beings who are swept up in the currents, I have found knitting allows me to sit most comfortably inside the illusion of control.

Even if I cannot stop destruction of the planet with more than my life choices to live simply, give up my car soon and eat only plants, and even if I cannot cure cancer or stop racial injustice or violence, I can sit inside an illusion of control and be at peace. Who is to say how effective a person can be as a change-maker by claiming their little corner of peace? I once had big dreams in my youth of making impact.

Now as I lean into the latter half of life, my vision is much smaller. I have no idea if what I create by sitting inside my beautiful illusion of control does anything for anyone else, but I do know it affords me a sense that I can be at peace. That is worth thousands of dollars of therapy at the least and at the most may ripple out to anyone who wears what I create or anyone in my circle.

About Erin W

A sensitive plant, bamboo strong.
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