Detour to Freedom

New moon at sunset from my new space

Well, I didn’t end up moving where I thought I was going to move in my last post, so I thought it was time for a detour mention. Same island, way further south.

I’ve landed in a beautiful spot for I know not how long, at least a year, with discussions underway on possible co-housing option to move to Oregon at some point. My nails have grown back to where I need to clip them (yes, I bite my nails with stress), and my meditation habit is back in full swing after a year of excuses. My daughter is thriving where she is in school, and I’m reassured she is more than okay.

I go where life takes me, and I’m getting better after more than 50 years of spinning around the sun at knowing what signs to follow that line up with my intuition. Often these signs make little sense to anyone else, but I’m trusting more and more in them.

For fun/entertainment, I throw oracle cards from time to time. Check out this 6-card spread I drew about my path in life right now during the middle of a massive lightning/thunder storm that knocked out power a few days ago:

  1. Past: Dry Desert (reversed) – Barren, nothing to give, no insights to be gained from reviewing the past at this time.
  2. Present: Sacred Pool – The world is a reflection of your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. Embody the love you wish to see in the world.
  3. What You Resist: Peaks of Joy – Your life is filled with happiness, so share it with others!
  4. Unexpected Help: Magic Prayer – Speak your prayers, listen for answers, act in faith.
  5. Next right action: Encouragement – You are receiving a nudge in the right direction.
  6. Probable future destination: Storm Fields (reversed) – This storm too will pass; say no to drama.

On one hand, I see a 50-something woman who’s neglected health maintenance for years due to inability to afford what insurance does not cover but earns too much to qualify for state aid, who’s not in a financial position to ever retire, and who’s working extra in a 7-day workweek to afford to keep her 20-year-old car going a few more years.

On the other hand, I am living in pinch-me I can’t believe it’s so surroundings with my own peaceful small space relishing a new phase of life that feels like it could be the joy of  retirement, fewer responsibilities, more mental space after the huge endeavor of raising a child, without retiring.

After completing a full marathon shortly before my 50th birthday, I envisioned my elder years being physically vibrant enough to do some stint in volunteer service overseas or some major hiking endeavor. Five years later, with pain ever since lifting a wheelbarrow incorrectly during volunteer service, and not wanting studies to investigate the source of said pain, I find myself happy to walk each day a mile or two, and I no longer desire a massive trek in my future. Happy being where I am (internally) as well as temporal surroundings.

Getting my meditation mojo back

Words spontaneously arrived alongside vision of a band of white light encircling Earth: “May all life on earth be protected and regeneration of the planet be assured. May eons of greed be ending and suffering be released to the wind.”

Lunch break walkabout

Divine vegan black bean chocolate pudding with plum

Dorothy Cleveland Trail lunch break

Good night from under the honeysuckle

About Erin W

A sensitive plant, bamboo strong.
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